The type of MS I have is slowly robbing me of my memories and making it difficult to form new ones. I no longer remember my first kiss. I know it happened, and I think I know who it was when I was in high school, but I can't describe it. All I have left are dry facts. (Name redacted) was my first kiss, I think. That's it. I don't know anymore how old I was, which grade I was in, which grade he was in (I was a grade ahead), or where it happened.
That's just one example out of many, and who knows what memories are gone that I don't even have the dry facts for? For example, I was looking for a place in the rodent cemetery in my back yard (where the pet rats and mice I've had over the past 7 years have been laid to rest) for Mycroft's grave. He had a major stroke or aneurysm on 11/29/15 at about 8pm, when I noticed he couldn't move and had fresh blood coming out of his right ear. Hubby and I didn't think he'd make it through the night, but he did, so he was euthanized at about 10am 11/30/15. Due to 2 flooding rain events, we haven't been able to bury him until now (he's been in the freezer, wrapped in a purple shroud).
I have a Draw document with the names and locations of the graves, which needed updating badly. Fortunately I also had a Write document that was a list and mini-biography for every rat we've had. I'd completely forgotten three of my rats until I saw their names on the list and read their bios. Over 2 years of having each of them, and I can't remember two of the three at all. Empty spot in my memory, like a hole.
How many things have I forgotten completely? Who have I forgotten?
What will be next?
When will I forget my husband?
When will I forget myself?
Edit: Crossposted from https://musa-urania.dreamwidth.org/770.html. The title of that journal is "Escape From Reality: One Sip from the Lethe at a Time". It seems reality follows me wherever I go.